If you’d asked me six weeks ago if I was excited about being freelance again, I would have looked at you aghast. After my experience in New Zealand, I associate freelancing with isolation, frustration and no work/life balance. I hated freelancing and couldn’t wait to be back in the full time workplace.
Six weeks ago, I was reeling from being made redundant and, for the first time in my working life, losing my job. I felt out of control and a little bit panicked. My aim was to relax for December and then put all my energy towards finding a full time job. In the meantime, I’d pick up any freelance work I could and keep busy.
And then I started thinking. Being freelance would work with my university schedule and it would allow me more flexibility to take on more subjects and life. I resigned myself to the fact that there are very few full time jobs out there. I started planning my time and thinking of ways to increase my freelance work to take the frustration out of the equation as much as possible. After all, it may be true that my experience lies in educational publishing but that doesn’t mean that my skills are limited. I didn’t really look for more work in New Zealand since I had ongoing clients at the time, but this time, I could do things differently.
And now I have an interview for a full time role tomorrow. Part of the interview will include an editing test and I’m really nervous. It’s a hard copy edit and I haven’t edited hard copy for years and my recent editing experience is thin on the ground, as most of my recent work has been overseeing projects more than hands on work. I know I have the skills but the pressure of showing them on an editing test is freaking me out. I know I interview well, but tests are objective – you’re either right or wrong.
So I’m thinking again. This job would be fantastic to get – it’s with an organisation that I’ve done freelance work for in the past and would love to work for. The job would be great experience but if I don’t get it, it’s not the end of the world. I have a bunch of ideas for getting some freelance work and I’m looking forward to having some time for my uni work as well.
Part of me is preparing to bomb on the editing test and therefore lose a client as well as a potential job. Maybe that’s a negative way to think about it but I’m confident that whatever happens tomorrow, I’ll be okay. The glass may not be full half yet but I have plans for filling it up.